schlockmagazine.net » February 2012 issue Sneak Peek!

February 2012 issue Sneak Peek!

Hello readers! Here is a sneak peek at Schlock Magazine’s February 2012 issue, the first non-themed issue in our four year history.

First up, here’s some artwork by Ellen Pace accompanying the short, apocalyptic, epistle with a smile, ‘Unto Ye’ by Manuel Royal.

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Here’s an extract from the short abstract tale ‘Miskatonic Monday’ by Peter Farrugia:

The holes in the old man’s socks had become so large that a bird, foraging for worms in the soil between his toes, got trapped there.

“I say,” it said, “do forgive me. I must say, this is awfully embarrassing.”

The old man plucked the bird out of the spider network of nylon threads and cotton unravelling, up past the variegated elastic band, and pursed his lips around the bird’s bobbling little head.

“I say,” it continued shrilly, in the sing-song dialect of those passerines who never stray far from the university quadrangle except to pass the time of day with robins circling the chaplaincy forecourt, “this really is frightfully unnecessary. I should say we might just forget all about it. I should say -”

The old man’s teeth crunched down with yellow, tombstone suddenness (tombstones that topple in the middle of the night) and the bird’s wings reflexively broadened in a final display of chestnut and mahogany before folding for good, forever.

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And as a final parting shot, a little bit of in-your-face opinion from Marco Attard.

SHERLOCK HOLMES: A GAME OF SHADOWS

“Have you even seen anything so mind-numbingly tedious?” I exclaimed at the end of Schlock End-Of-Year Meet and Movie Night. The film of choice was the sequel to the diverting 2009 Guy Ritchie take on the Sherlock Holmes. The follow-up is more of the same, only more so – bigger, louder, shootier. Action taking place over half a continent, soundtrack a terrifying mess of jangling pianos and strings, shockingly rampant speed ramping abuse. All in the name of mindless fun!

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The full issue will be published tomorrow, so stay alert and keep refreshing your inbox!

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